Been a long time since I’ve shown two martial arts films on a Friday night. Maybe it’s because after almost eight years it’s hard to find two martial arts films that don’t make you want to tear your eyes out.
Let’s call tonight Retarded Wire-Fu Double Feature
First up Sakura Killers with Chuck Connors
Our second feature Twin Daggers
Sorry about the god-awful title of this post. And a few seconds of googling will show I’m not the first genius to come up with that little gem of wordplay. Anywho I started watching giallo and I’m hooked. Why? Who knows? Maybe I just like watching a genre that makes me look around the room and ask, “What the fuck is going on?” and “Did I miss something, am I fucking high?”
Doing some research for more titles to get I found The Do-It-Yourself Giallo Kit. It generates random fake-giallo including title, director, and plot summary.
Here’s one I just did:
Two White Doves in a Glass Coffin
Directed by
Ruggero Ruggeri
A disturbed young nurse who has been accused of a crime vanishes without leaving a trace. Her friend is implicated in the disappearance. Ultimately she apparently discovers the culprit’s identity. The fleeing suspect is accidentally killed; but in a shocking twist, it turns out the real criminal is someone nobody suspected…!
Awesome!
Now if I can just wake up Dr. Mrs. The LawGiver so we can watch Tenebre.
Ciao!
UPDATE
Here’s a lists of giallo I have watched in this spree:
Pat: Damn, I forgot to bring your birthday present.
Paul: That’s okay, Pat, don’t worry about it. Do you mind if I ask what you got me?
Pat: I found it when I was in Maine. I got you a pocket fisherman.
Paul: AWESOME! THAT’S GREAT! Is it the real Pocket Fisherman, like the one when we were kids?
Pat: Yes, Paul. The box has a picture of Ron Popeil on it.
Heaven.
Ever since I was a little kid, I wanted a pocket fisherman. I don’t know why, it’s not like I ever really went fishing when I was a kid. It just looked so convenient. The little devil was small enough to fit in a glove compartment, or a backpack. I always thought that if I was leisurely wandering through the woods and happened upon a beautiful bubblin’ crick, I would have my handy pocket fisherman clipped to my belt. Of course I don’t know what I would use for bait. Would I have to dig up worms then? And if I caught a fish, what the hell was I going to do with it? I guess I would just throw it back. I don’t see myself as a kid scaling a fish and starting a fire because I felt a little peckish when I was walking through the woods. In retrospect, it really doesn’t make a lot of sense. But I have a pocket fisherman now, so I got that going for me. Of course I don’t plan on going fishing anytime soon, and if I did and brought this thing, I would probably get beat up. But luckily, it makes an excellent cat toy. See it comes with a “practice casting plug,” which you use to practice casting. So I can sit in the living room and cast away into the kitchen, and reel me in a cat. Actually, Milton will play, but Byron’s still scared of it. He hides underneath the table.
Popeil Pocket Fisherman Commercial
Can be seen HERE
